PSEUDO-BEACH BOUND

Summer is almost here and to me, above all, that means one thing: I'm going to have to shave, I'm going to have to do it frequently. I'm talking armpits, legs, arms, chin. Seriously joking about the latter. Ou pas. I am a woman with middle eastern heritage after all, and if you dont know what that means ill tell you right now - my hair is as thick as a toothpick and sometimes a number equal to or more than one will attempt to grow out of a single pore and that is that...

Then there's the painful, almost torturous presidure known as the Brazilian Wax. The thought of it flips my stomach. Which is why I will put this subject aside only to revisit and dedicate it a story of its own.

One might interrupt and ask when on earth will I shut the hell up about the mutant characteristics of my hair growth and start discussing the clothes I so carefully picked out for you, pictured above, to which I'll simply respond -- now. 

The Gigi bikini by ETE is to die for, so is the Maison Michel embroidered panama hat and Ancient Greek sandals. Ksubi shorts that you should have had by now because remember Spring Essentials? Isabel Marant blouse -- your ruffles remind me of ocean waves and breeze and nothing else. Oh, and I love you. Sophia Webster (featured twice this week now) heels, House of Holland sunglasses I've been lusting over for quite some time now and Zara blouse because is the shit so to speak. 

Am I missing things? Which things?! Tell me!

SUMMER JAM SERIES

For reasons no other than it's May and it's finally beautiful out, I decided to create mini series of Summer jams for sunny daze and good vibez. Solange is obviously opening the series with "Losing you". 

ADD COLOR TO YOUR FEET

How does one pump up an outfit if all one wears is a pair of jeans and a denim shirt? Footwear. Lots and lots of footwear preferably in a variety of styles and colors -- italicizing words as a pun technique because, well, look up. 

Neons, bolds, circles, flowers, holes, zebras, pandas... Are you seeing what I'm seeing? And trust me, no one will ever notice that grey shirt you've been trying to rock for 5 days straight now. 

Left to right, then drop a row, and left to right again: Jimmy Choo patent leather sandals, Nicholas Kirkwood suede color blocks, Charlotte Olympia's lacy flower arrangement, Jimmy Choo part deux that might seem like a zebra on the outside but really is a bunch of pandas of the inside, Sophia Webster's sandal that so strongly reminiscences of my playground years, Jimmy Choo part three, only because of how superstitious I am.  

DRESS TO CONFIDENCE: BUT REALLY

When discussing a certain past event, that is the Punk: Chaos to Couture themed gala hosted at the met this past Monday, the inevitable "best/worst dressed" conversation took a different turn when a friend claimed "SJP was so unattractive, no man would ever like that". I felt responsible to contradict such foolish statement if not because that, in fact, happened to be my favorite outfit of the night, but because I was outraged by the idea of her judging outfits by their level of man attracting. Has Man Repeller taught you nothing? Have I (a friend of 3 years) taught you nothing?

I feel as if it's my duty to remind you, ladies, to dress for your own special self only. When dressing think not of the points you score from opposite sex (or same, do your thing) but of the way you feel walking around in that clothes. Does it make you feel like yourself? Does yourself want to experiment and feel like a different self through different clothes? And most importantly, do you feel confident in such clothes? Because remember, the best thing a woman can wear is her confidence.

FENDI, FENDI, PRADA

Here's a little story about my day. I woke up, checked Instagram (oh, is this really not the first thing you do in the am?), brushed my teeth, made some coffee, put on my jeans, looked down at my feet and thought to myself "Man, I wish I had a pair of Fendis to put on". The idea behind my thought process was that if I had a shoe so structural, color-blocked, spiked yet cool I could just throw a white button down and go on with my day. Doesn't that just sound right?

CHAOS TO COUTURE

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At times it's hard to draw the line between SJC vs CB, especially when she shows up dress in this. It's sort of like the BIG wedding all over again only the dress white dress developed gold stains over time and the bird on her head grew out a mohawk. 

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Rooney Mara in Givenchy holding an invisible cheeseburger. 

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Olsen sisters are just the type of people who know how to do couture. Ball or no ball.

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Do you agree or what?

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LSD in D&G. Salute the choker. 

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Giovanna Battaglia had a ball of her own dressing for this ball. Anglomania done right. 

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Linda Evangelista as the modern day Rapunsel.